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Best present evar!, originally uploaded by FANLESS. Wow! If you know me, then you know that I practically live off of energy drinks (and buffalo wings and ice cream)! Mike just gave me the best birthday present evAr! A case of Monster AND a case of Red Bull! AMAZING! You should go to Mike and [...]

I thought I was going out again tonight, but I just looked at the clock, and my phone hasn’t rang, as far as I know, so I think it’s a safe bet to say that I’m staying in tonight. That’s probably a good thing because I think I have woken up hung over the past [...]

Today my fonts seem to be either drnk(.com!) or on vacation.

A client sends me a mock up along with the images to be used on their card. I start creating the card and realize that they didn’t send me one of the images that is in their mock up. I send them an email with an incomplete proof showing a blank space where the missing [...]

…so someone emails me 2 word documents that they want printed as posters, and I email them back saying we don’t print from Word and to please send a PDF or jpeg or whatever. So then the brainiac calls me and the conversation went something like this… Me: Well, we don’t print Word documents… I [...]

Me: Jules (or Jewles, as I like to call him), did you know that Hitler started the Holocaust because a Jewish prostitute gave him syphilis? Jules: I don’t think that’s true. Where did you hear that? Me: Digg! Jules: (eyeroll) That’s just a conspiracy theory. Me: Yeah, right! You just have trouble believing it because [...]

Best email of the day! P.S.: Yes, I know I’m fat. No, I don’t plan on going on a diet! You’re right, trucker hats are SO 2002 zOMG!! And thank you for noticing that my sweet, sweet beard is totally going gray. What do you want from me? I’M (almost) OLD!

Here’s an email I just received from one of my clients. Vote for her to be Maxim’s next Hometown Hottie! Hey everyone please show your support and vote for me!!! You can vote only once daily but for the next 30 days!!!! thanks everyone and wish me luck! http://www.maximonline.com/hotties/semi_profile_2007.aspx?id=19521 resend this email to all your [...]

Almost every job I do has a proof that needs to be approved of before it is printed. A while back I made a proof for someone, they approved it, and we printed their composites. A couple of weeks later they realized that the date of birth on the card was wrong (5-2-03) and they [...]

Lrn 2 speel!, originally uploaded by FANLESS. Believe it or not, it’s kind of important to spell things correctly when giving instructions. I took “blaack paper” to mean I was supposed to print something on black paper, which we don’t have, so I was like WTF?? It turns out that “blaack paper” actually says “blanck [...]

I really wish I could post this video I just received in an email, but I cherish my job and the wealth that I have too much to risk “legal actions” again. Believe it or not, I am able to learn from my mistakes (which is not actually saying I ever made a mistake). Anyways, [...]

I finally emailed Apple’s customer relations about my iMac. Now I guess I just keep my fingers crossed that people will live up to their promises and my machine will get replaced. If not, I may have bought my last Mac. I’m not overly upset that the thing has died four times now… Things happen. [...]

Here is an email I just received: I like is perfect … tell me…… whent will be ready my composite I want 50 copies of that gracias Wow!

WOW, some people are not so bright! So I emailed a proof to this woman and then she replied with this: Hi Christian , looks good lets print 200 and do half with the logo and half no logo.oh I put the pic in the upload Translated, that means she sent the same images (5, [...]