I took all of these pics from in front of my building. (not counting the shots from the beach)

Whatchu know about THAT?

Yo, you saw that scooter birgade??

Naw, man… Where they at??

This girl was drunk as hell and fighting with her man. At least her titty was falling out!

Rims still be spinnin’!

Obviously, this Hummer wins the FANLESS.com Most Tight Whip of Black Beach Weekend Award!

It’s “Snoopy Dogg Dogg”!

Here we have a perfect display of Lamborghini doors.

And here we have the exact opposite!!

…and I’m thinking… Man, let your friend use the mirror so she can see that she forgot to put a shirt on!! Dang!

This picture exists to prove to myself that I can take a relatively non-blurry pic with a relatively slow exposure.

TOO MUCH BOOTY IN THEM PANTS!! I mean shorts. Actually, that’s a pretty mediocre ass. Some of them were like “OH MY GOODNESS!!”

PINK!!!

Push up on it, girl! Don’t be skerred! Dang!

LOL AZNZ!!

Further down the block she was REALLY uncensored!

What you can’t tell from this picture is that the girl was totally hopping on the back of the bike. It was amazing! They were all doing it!

I’m really proud of this picture! I forgot my friend’s name, but he’s from Louisiana.

BRAAAAAP!!!

You want debauchery? How’s this for debauchery??



She’s putting her leg behind her head!

White people. Oh, wait… LOLesbianZ!!

TITTIES!

Would you play Smear the Queer with this woman??

Huddle up, ladies!

Oh, hay! Your tittie fell out!!

Whatchu mean you don’t like the black guy in the thong???

Maybe you’ll like this white guy a little more!

Hey, at least he doesn’t have gold/chrome/platinum/diamond/blinging teef!!

This is how slammed the beach was on Sunday at about 3:30!

White people. Oh, wait… LOLesbianZ!!

White people. Oh, wait… LOLesbianZ!! (I WOULD!!!)

You talking to ME? Whatchu mean my shoe lace is untied?? I ain’t even got no shoe laces!

So wassup girl… You gonna give me the skins or what?

Getting digits!

Check the grille! That’s gold!!

For real girl… I can get you in the VIP!

I like this picture.

More than that, I really like this girl. She lives in West Palm. A lot of them did. Or at least they were all giving out 561 numbers.

Number 1: I was happy that I got to talk with Rick from stuckonthepalmetto.blogspot.com again! He’s one of my favorites! Aslo, I was stoked that I FINALLY got to meet Alex, too.
Number 2: I got to meet Miami Fever!! I have such a super hard boner for his pictures!! I mean, his pictures make me want to NEVER touch a camera again because I KNOW that I can’t go next level like he does, and it kind of bums me out. But his pictures don’t bum me out at all! They’re all A+++!
Number 3: Actually, number 3 and 4 are a toss-up between Restaurant Gal and Sara from All Purpose Dark. I think RG was a a tiny bit stoked that I was familiar with her blog, but Sara went Next Level by dropping an F-bomb! I love girls that aren’t afraid to tell it how it is. Especially if it includes swearing!!
Number 5: zOMG I MET DAN RENZI FROM MTV’s REAL WORLD!!1!!1oneOneONE ELEVEN11!!! So, we’re going around the room, and everyone is introducing themselves, and this guy that I hadn’t yet seen, but was sitting 4 people down from me, stands up and says “Hello, I’m Dan… I write for the Miami New Times and I apologize for… blah blah blah.” My point being, he didn’t say he was on The Real World, and I was like… “WTF?? This dude looks familiar… HOLY CRAP!!! Is that Dan from the Real World: Miami??” Then I asked a couple of people I was sitting next to if that was the dude, and nobody knew, but then Sara confirmed and I think a little paternal cool whip came out at that moment! Because… Nobody knows what it was like for me to be in college in Walla Walla Washington, watching The Real World: Miami, and thinking about how cool those people were, even if they started out as regular Joe’s, for the most part. I mean, I think (as in, I’m 99/9% SURE) I still have the entire season on VHS!! Seriously, before I came to Miami, everything I knew about Miami came from Miami Vice and The Real World! In fact, if not for The Real World, I maybe never would have came here in the first place! So that was kind of a big deal to me, but I never really talked to him, because I didn’t want to be all… “Remember that time when you said XYZ to Flora?? OMG THAT WAS SO AWESOME!!!” Or whatever. I don’t know… You can say what you will, but it was neat to me!
Other than that, I mostly hung out with my usual crew… Tere, Maria, Yvette, and Scott.

Obviously, Gus and Michelle deserve MAJOR PROPS for organizing this party, and, most of all, footing the bill! I hope it was worth it for them, because it was for sure worth it to me!

Actually, to make it wort it to them, how about checking out MiamiBeach411.com? Maybe even sign up and post in the forums! I’ve made a whopping 2 posts there myself! I dare you to try to top me!

Here are more pics!
…and more here!
…AND EVEN MORE HERE!
….and more here… (I don’t think I’m in any of these, so, you know…)

You might be able to see these pics, but probably not because I think Kathy has them on lock-down. Too bad for you.

There’s a pretty good chance I was sending YOU a text message at this particular moment.

P.S. to the girls I sat next to: Thanks for the memories!
(even though they weren’t so great)

Apparently, I am about to die. I can’t wait!

Also, this storm is very “I’m gonna go wreck Christian’s life!” and then tomorrow night, when I should be seeing Fall Out Boy, it’s gonna be like, LOL J/K!!1 and hang a right.

I’m pretty much shitting myself right now zOMG!!! (<===click here if the video doesn’t load!)

Tried to take a picture of construction finally happening at the 12th and Washington Starbucks today, but I just got snow on my screen and actually had to pull the battery to get it to function as a phone. My phone also stopped getting a working signal while I am at home a few weeks ago, and apparently this ailment has spread to work now too. In short, I am in dire need of a new phone. The problem is that the Apple phone doesn’t come out until sometime next month (oh hay it’s THIS month now!!) so I have to work with a mostly busted RAZR and wait for the iPhone, or take it and get a blackjack instead. I am very undecided on what to do.
Speaking of busted, have you seen my right knee lately? This knee has been giving me grief for 3 years now, and I have no idea why. As far as I know, I never injured it. I just remember waking up and being like “Oh hey, my knee is sore!” and it’s pretty much been that way ever since. Except sometimes it’s a lot more sore than usual. Like for the past week or 2! the dang thing swelled up and has been super sore/tender. Again, I have no idea why and I have no plan to find out why/treat the problem. I have faith that it will return to it’s usual lower level of pain sooner or later. It hasn’t been too much of an issue lately… I just try to stay off of it other than walking to work, which is super close. However, I am quickly running out of food so I might be having a lot of meals delivered if this thing doesn’t sort itself out in a hurry. A ride all the tori anus way to Publix at this point in time (and pain) is not sounding like such a great time. Maybe if they had a killer sale on ice cream or something it would be worth it. Otherwise, I’ll keep La Sandwicherie and Cheeseburger Baby on speed dial. Except… I have to limp outside to even make any calls! Hurry up with the iPhone already!! I’m getting hungry.

P.S.:
LOL SOUTH BEACH!! (or some beach)

Live from in front of my building!!

Check out my ghetto setup! I couldn’t angle it to fit the camera in, but it’s sitting on the tripod in the background.