anywhoo

Tonight I updated WordPress and some plugins. Of (fairly uninteresting) note are these two new pages: users and stats. The users page shows how many people are browsing this site in realtime and about the only interesting thing about that is that there were 58 people browsing fanless.com at the same time on January 6th. I have no idea why. I was in West Palm that day and not even on the innernets. The stats page shows some kind of interesting stats about my blog. I’m just running it in stock form so any spelling/grammar issues should fall on the developer’s shoulders, not mine. As you can see, 2 old posts keep getting tons of comments that I can’t read.
Oh, and speaking of stats…

I came kind of close to getting 2 million page views in 2006.


Here’s a breakdown by month. I expect 2007′s stats to look more like 2005 than 2006. I’m feeling rather over blogging/the innernets. It’s like, the more I realize people are actually reading what I type the less I feel like typing on the innernets.

Beyond all that, my cousin Scott’s wife Lisa had a baby over the weekend. You can read all about it at their blog. Also, my other cousin, Scott’s sister, Tiffany, has her own blog and you should read it too.

internets

Hello internets,
My iMac is still dead but at this point I think it’s mostly my fault that nothing is changing with that. Whenever there are disruptions in the force and especially when I meet resistance in rectifying the disruption, I tend to just ignore the situation all together. That’s the situation right now. My iMac G5 is sitting in its box in my apartment in the exact same place it has been since I got it home from the Apple store last Wednesday. The thing is a headache I’m not ready to deal with. The Apple store people told me they would repair it for free (for the 4th time – 3rd time in something like the last 8 months) but if I want it replaced then I need to email someone at Apple and beg them to authorize a replacement. Sounds simple enough, but I’m just not ready to face their reply that will likely say “LOL P0WNT!!1″ or something to that effect. I’ve heard way too many empty promises over this computer to have any faith in this last resort person I’m supposed to email. Actually, I guess the true last resort would be the legendary sjobs@mac.com email address where according to legend, “Steve Jobs’ personal assistant” will get back to me and set my world straight. I’m not sure if I have enough pull to make that happen, but then all I’d have to do is write an amazing blog post about the saga with this ill iMac and get it dugg on digg.com. I just don’t know if I have all of that in my nature. I’d probably just bend over, take it, and just get the thing fixed for free once again and hope it doesn’t die again.
And that’s the thing that really bothers me the most. I’m really not after a new computer. My iMac G5 does everything I need it to do and keeps me smiling until it dies. All I really want is some faith in my machine. A piece of mind that will allow me to rely on it. I had this iMac G5 for just over 2 months when it died for the first time. That was really disappointing, but I thought all was well when it stayed running for over a year after the initial fix. But since this last rash of breakdowns I am really starting to question the reliability of Apple. If this were my first computer then I might be like “Ok, I guess computers don’t last very long.” I mean, this machine is over 2 years old. But this isn’t my first computer. In fact, I have an Apple Quadra 800 that is around 13 years old and still runs great! And I have my 7.5 year old 350 MHz PowerMac G3 that currently has a 3 week uptime. I’ve never had any problems with either of these computers and I don’t think luck has anything to do with it. Is it unreasonable for me to expect another 5 years of life out of my iMac G5? I don’t think so.
So that’s where things sit with my iMac G5. I need to email this person and hope/pray that they see things from my point of view and authorize the replacement of my computer.

hello internet

Hello Internet,
My iMac G5 is still dead and I amfinding much resistance in the path to a replacement.
Strings may need to be pulled, and favors will probably be cashed in, but I am confident in my destination.
Please update me on how your internets are doing.
okthnxbye

New Jeers!

Once again, my iMac G5 is dead. =( This is now the 4th time (3rd time since May!). I was laying on the couch today, watching Nebraska lose, and all of a sudden I heard the Mac startup chime. If I wasn’t oh-so-familiar with the situation I might have thought my apartment had a ghost.
The poor machine won’t stay running for any amount of time. It just shuts off with no warning.
There SHOULD be a claim number for this computer on file with Apple stating that I have an 8 month warranty after the last time I got it fixed (in September), but that seems a little moot since Apple seems to have changed their Service Extension Program. It used to say it would cover this issue for 2 years after the original purchase date, but now it says 3 years.
HOWEVER… When I inquired about getting a replacement machine in July, after the thing had died for the 3rd time, they told me it had to be FIXED 3 times before they would replace it.
I BETTER GET A NEW FUCKING MACHINE THIS TIME!
I am so over this computer. (I mean my iMac, not this $250, 3 year old eMachine running openSUSE 10.2 I am typing this post on. Probably the best $250 I ever spent.)

dud

zOMG u guiez da f1rewerx on souf beesh were s0 assum! did u c dem??

What a let-down. I hope this isn’t a prelude to how 2007 is going to be.
P.S.: Official word: FIreworks cancelled due to bad weather.
ORLY??

Jean’s beaver, Joy’s Panda, and Lucy’s butt!

Almost every day I feel like I should type something on the innernets, but I don’t really ever have anything to say.
So here’s a re-run from a post I made back in a little over 4 years ago. I think it’s kind of funny, but probably not if you don’t know any of the people I type about.

The recent expiration of my milfhunter.com account has left me with two free minutes. I’m going to use these 2 minutes to fill you in on what has been going on.
On November 1st Kim came down and we walked all over South Beach hitting every tattoo shop we could find. I finally got my ear piercings stretched from 16 gauge to 10 gauge at South Beach Tattoo. That’s the same place where that girl from Jackass,  Tuesday   Wednesday, pierced my lip nearly 3 years ago. I hope to get to a 6 guage when Brandon is here later this month.
Of course, I turned 28 on Veteran’s Day, November 11th. That day was rather uneventful. Nothing like last year.
On the 25th of November, Kim made a return visit to Miami Beach, and we went to Lissette’s birthday party at Carl and Chad’s place on Palm Island. For some reason I wasn’t feeling the scene. I don’t know why, but I wasn’t in much of a partying mood. I did, however, get to see Jean’s beaver (kinda).
The next day Kim and I did a bit of shopping at the Aventura Mall. Kim got 2 pairs of sunglasses, and a big-ass stuffed Panda bear for Joy. Kim made me carry it all around the mall. I think because it was taller than her. The f00king thing was pulling chicks like mad, so I didn’t really mind. One hawt girl that worked at Pac-Sun saw it and said, “Awww! Is it soft?” I wanted to say “Not anymore!” but I didn’t because she was a bit too young, and Kim was right there and would have ragged on my cheezieness for the rest of the day, if not the rest of my life.
From there Kim and I trekked North to West Palm for yet another birthday party. This time it was for Joy. I was in a better mood, but not my usual self. To this day I can’t figure out what was wrong with me that weekend. I caught a ride back to Miami with Chad and Lissette late that night. Several pictures from both parties can be found here.
In browsing through some of those pictures, I remembered something worth noting…
You may recall me saying something about Lissette’s friend Lucy a while back, and it’s no secret that I’ve had a boner for her ever since, but I never really thought that I would be someone that she would remember. Well, I was talking to her that night at Chad’s and she axed me if “I still had that Pink bike”. She remembered my Pork!! I’M MEMORABLE!! Or at least my bike is. Lissette told me a while back that I should have busted a move a long time ago because now she’s living with some putzy guy. But you know how it is… He who hesitates… Here’s a not-so-flattering picture of Lucy’s ass. It’s a shame that she’s not really in any other pictures from that night. I WOULD!!
After 3 more days of work, I spent Thanksgiving at Wendy’s once again. The usual Thanksgiving feast and festivities. We watched Ice Age and the video from their trip across the US. Before we ate I had to play house with Zoë. She had some bowls totally filled with water. I mean, so full that they overflowed when she put spoons in them. She was biting chunks of her carrot off and putting them into the water, or what she called “Carrot soup”. She was getting mad at me because i wouldn’t really eat it. She cried really hard when it was time for me to go home. She begged me to stay the night. It made me feel bad.
I bet you wish you had a kid as rad as Zoe!

The next day I hopped on the Tri-Rail and spent the next 3 days in West Palm.
My 2 minutes is up now, so I’ll have to end with that.

Shaun Alexander vs Young MC

I have drama (and yes, this will reveal how amazingly complicated my life is).
The Seattle Seahawks are slated the take on the 49ers tonight on my TV at 8 PM. Sounds awesome, right? Especially since I was stuck in a car heading to Seattle on Sunday when the Seahawks last played (and lost). Only, there is a problem… That Nike run thing is supposed to happen at 8 PM too.
I am torn. Do I stay home and watch the Seahawks or do I go out and see Vanilla Ice, De La Soul, Young MC, Coolio, and Digital Underground??I can always tivo the Hawks game, but watching it after the fact just isn’t the same.
Does live in real life trump live on my TV?
WHAT TO DO??

Please don’t bomb/hijack/crash/delay/cancel/whatever these flights!

It’s Seattle eve and I’ve only packed two fuckin’ back packs!
It‘s Seattle eve and I’ve only packed two fuckin’ back packs!
And I hate, Hate, HATE your guts…
I hate, Hate, HATE your guts…
And I’ll never talk to you again…
unless your dad will suck me off…
I’ll never talk to you again…
unless your mom will touch my cock…
I’ll never talk to you again…
ejaculate into a sock…
I’ll never talk to you again…
I’ll never talk to you again…
(I’ve been saying that since 2001!)

Please don’t bomb/hijack/crash/delay/cancel/whatever these flights!

Actually, this is kind of wrong. I’m coming back on Tuesday, not Monday. I still need to make a ticket change.

ATTENTION WASHINGTON STATE!

**ATTENTION WASHINGTON STATE**
On Thursday I will be flying to Seattle for a long weekend. If you can remember back to last year, this will be a very similar situation. I will even be wearing the same coat. I haven’t even had it on since I got home from last year’s trip. I should be landing in Seattle sometime between 12 and 1 PM. I’ll probably head downtown, but I really have no plans at all. Unlike last year, I DO NOT plan on drinking nearly as much, if at all. Last year I got so ripped I barely remember most of the night. During our trip to Othello the next morning we had to pull over 3 times so I vomit on the side of the road. It wasn’t fun at all. It was easily the most miserable trip across the Cascades I have ever experienced. And I have experienced some fairly miserable trips across the Cascades in my time!!
I think I’ve made this trip 9 out of the last 10 Decembers, and I’m really not enthused. For some reason everyone there seems more excited to see me than I am to see them. I don’t really know why that is. It’s not meant as a dig on anyone… I really like everyone I’ll see and don’t have issues with anyone there. I’m just not to a point to where I’m dying to see anyone. Everything will be the same, but I won’t be able to experience it in the same way as when I lived there.

One more reason why I’m not overly excited about this trip.

40 oz in my lap and it’s freezing my


It’s kind of cold in my apartment tonight and I still don’t have a heater. I am warming my feet with this lamp. There were about 2 million dead bugs in the lamp and now they’re on my floor (and socks).
Last night I had to make a life threatening choice! Risk freezing to death while riding to Publix for food after work, or risk starving to death at home because I didn’t have any food. I decided to brave the conditions and make the trek to West Ave. I made it back alive. It actually wasn’t that bad. Tonight feels colder.

on the verge of being dirty t00 and still rippin’!

If I didn’t receive a birthday card from you in the mail today, you can deliver it to me personally tomorrow (Saturday). I don’t have any plans so I’ll probably just be hanging out. I am hoping there will be a parade down Washington like last year, but I can’t find any info about it on the CMB site.
I actually like late birthday cards more than cards that come early. Since my birthday is always on a no-mail holiday, I never get cards in the mail on my actual birth day. Cards that come early kind of suck because either you open them before your birthday, which is fine, I guess, but not usually my style, or you save them for the real day. Early birthday cards that you save for the actual day are real assholes though! They’re all tempting you and they’re like, “C’mon! OPEN ME!! I’m for you!! Someone probably wrote some nice things about you and maybe there’s money in me. Don’t you want to find out? C’mon!! Don’t try to kid yourself; you know you don’t have enough will power to wait until your birthday! Just open me right now! What are you waiting for??” and stuff like that.
Birthday cards that show up late are awesome! It’s like, your birthday comes and goes and you’re over it and then a couple days later you check your mail and HOLY MEAT! ANOTHER BIRTHDAY CARD!! H00RAY!!! and you get to celebrate a little more.

This year I received 5 cards in the mail from two aunts, one uncle, my parents, and my grandparents. I haven’t opened them yet. They’re taunting me as I type this. I’ll show them that I DO have enough will power to wait another 4 hours before I open them.
It looks like the most birthday love is coming from MySpace this year. Nearly two dozen happy birthday comments/messages to date.
We’ll see what happens tomorrow.