what the hell?

Wow, today is starting out to be fairly odd!
I did a commendable job of getting ready for work earlier than usual so I could do a couple of things before heading in. I walked over to the bank, and on the way it felt like a lot of people on the sidewalk were trying to get in my way and hold me up. Then when I got to the bank, some woman with a dog was in front of me in line, and when it was her turn at the counter, she waited an extraordinarily long time for her dog to finish sniffing whatever it was sniffing before actually going to the counter. And then it was my turn and everything went fine and quick.
I walked across the street to Lee Ann Drug to get some wings (Red Bull!). They didn’t have any so I bought a bottle of Cherry Coke instead. I went to pay for it and I got behind some old guy that was just moseying along. I was waiting for him to get out of the way so I could step up to the counter to pay, and some old woman swooped in behind him, and in front of me, to pay for her items. I would have been like, oh yeah fuck whatever, not not really cared, but this woman was slower than my asshole and she took forever, talking about everything with the cashier. At this point I felt like I was on some hidden camera tv show or something! It wasn’t a matter of me being in a hurry/impatient and noticing everyday occurrences as slowdowns… These people were really being slow!
I finally got to pay for my soda, and walked down the street to work. I booted up my computer and walked a few doors down to get a can of the elusive Red Bull. Guess what happened! They had cans of Red Bull, but the guy in front of me in line to pay must have been Chatty Cathy’s brother or something, because he had a lot to say (in spanish, no less, so I have no idea what they were talking about). Whatever it was that they were talking about must have been pretty good because after that guy left, the 2 women behind the counter talked to each other for what seemed like an eternity while I stood there, money in hand, waiting to pay. I quickly grew tired of waiting and just laid my $2.30 on the counter, said “Thanks” and walked out.
And now… I wasn’t going to type anything about my morning, but there was this woman trying to park her car in front of the office and she was taking so long it pushed me over the edge and I decided that everything around me today is going super slow. I typed this whole post (and I’m no speed demon in typing, let me tell ya…) and she’s still trying to park her car!
Oh, wait… I think she got it.